Yesterday morning I got up and had breakfast and these people came to disinfect the house and garden for cockroaches which of course are gross but it meant that yesterday and today we couldn't let Riccardo crawl anywhere but his playpen and the grass outside where there were no chemicals. I absolutely adore him but seriously he has the shortest attention span known to man and he has so many toys and he just wants to play with everything but the toys. He has so much energy it is incredible. I spent the day inside while Erica had to run errands and so I played with him, gave him his lunch, got him to sleep etc but I also did a workout andlearnt some more italian on the Duolingo app (which is slowly becoming my saviour). Erica's parents came in the evening and they are from Milan, I really enjoyed meeting them. I do like Michele's parents but I think their wealth maybe intimidates me a little and I feel a little beneath them when I am in their presence. I found Erica's parents were very down to earth and chatty with me which made me feel very welcome. Erica's dad cooked dinner, he cooked prawns, scallops and other fish (I didn't really like the fish that had been baked in the oven because it had too many bones in and I hate having to eat something that is a huge hassle to eat) however everything else was incredible, I love all the fresh food here and it is so much cheaper than back home. I wish we had fresh, local produce rather than huge supermarkets raking all my money in :(
Today has probably been the WORST day I've had since being here, this is no joke my friends. Children are real...they aren't playing...well they are but when they get mad...wow. I feel so sorry for Riccardo he is teething and today he had a fever and because we couldn't let him crawl round like he usually would I felt really limited to what I could do with him...he couldn't play outside because it's over 30 degrees and with a fever that's really not a good idea..he couldn't crawl in the house because of the chemicals and he barely ate or slept all day. I felt like I was..as you say..walking on egg shells...except it was more like broken glass...
I am going to write this blog as honestly as possible. I am not going to try and dress up being an au pair if it isn't as good as I thought but so far it has been an amazing experience and I have appreciated every single thing this family has done for me and they have been incredibly welcoming. But Erica will 100% agree on how bad today went.
I can only describe it as the moment in the Sex and the City movie when Charlotte has a huge breakdown when she is trying to cook and the baby is screaming and her daughter puts her painted hands on her dress and she screams in her face and then the hot Nanny comes and takes the children away soothing them and she locks herself in the closet sobbing. Except today there was no hot Nanny... I suppose that should have been played by me but there is nothing hot about the sweaty pineapple shaped bun I have had on my head all day and the huge bags under my eyes right now. It was actually instead the nanny here today that walked into her room crying.. I am a mess. Not only did I cry but Erica lost the plot after trying to get Riccardo to nap with her and him just consistently screaming she put him in his pram and shouted to which I did take over, however at no point did either of us manage to calm the situation because nothing we did today relaxed him. Last night I barely slept after having a bad dream about my room here being haunted and then waking up thinking it was real...things like this terrify me!
I got up this morning incredibly exhausted and my first mistake was having DECAFF coffee.. who the fuck invented decaff?!! Seriously it does nobody any favours. Then I played with Riccardo after having my breakfast for probably an hour and that was the most content I had seen him all day then Erica got him to sleep so I attempted a workout and then had a strop because I was too tired and went outside and sat on a big chair with my book and tried to catch a tan because although people think I have just been sunbathing I haven't had much of a chance to. I probably spent half an hour outside before it was round two ding ding.... Erica freezes fresh fruit smoothies into ice cubes and put them in this amazing invention that's like a dummy except the teet is netting and you put whatever in..in this case the iced fruit and they use it like a dummy but it soothes teething so we tried him with this and then he got ratty again so Erica tried to get him to sleep. I went to my room and fell asleep also (you wouldn't believe how grateful I was for that hour nap) and then Erica's personal trainer had arrived and she told me Riccardo had barely slept again so I fed him his lunch and showed him Peppa pig as I thought it would be good to show him english in this way and he was grinning his little head off...this lasted all of 2 minutes when yesterday he had really enjoyed watching it and had sat in awe for a good five minutes. How things change. I tried to get him to sleep again and he slept on and off for twenty minutes.. I was trying to cook mine and Erica's lunch whilst having to rock his pram slightly to keep him sleeping as every movement he made seemed to wake him up.
I had to peel about nine prawns to go into the spaghetti....now I'm not religious but I found myself praying to something that I could get through peeling these prawns without waking up because stirring something in a pan and having the baby is easier than peeling these little buggers but I got to the fourth prawn and he woke. When Erica came in she took Riccardo but I kept dropping everything...because of course when you're stressed you lose all hand-eye co-ordination and literally lose your shit... she asked me if I had a headache because I didn't seem myself...I was practically blue in the face at this point from not being able to please him in any way.... and I told her that I felt completely helpless because of him teething and I feel so sorry for him and I felt like I was doing a bad job...of course me being me had to quickly make a detour and head straight to my room to cry because I was so worked up. Why do I cry so easily when I'm stressed?! My worst trait.
After having a little cry I felt slightly better however that didn't seem to ease our situation... we had our lunch and he was screaming and I'm not even joking he was LAUGHING at us.. laughing how exhausted we were after only a few hours with him! I kid you not Riccardo thought he was an award-winning comedian. I didn't smile at all....I probably spent half my morning texting Ant venting because I felt like it was impossible to get anything right. After this she tried to get him to nap with her so I went outside again and skyped Ant and learnt some italian, then after a little bit I heard him crying so I came inside and I could see Erica getting just as stressed "He just won't sleep!" she ranted while putting him in the pram. I felt like I had relaxed a little more at this point so I pushed him around and finally got him to sleep for a short while. We were supposed to go out in the afternoon but we were both too stressed so Erica made us coffee and we finally had a proper sit down together...most sitting down time here is precious as it's not long before he wants to do something else... obviously all babies are like this but to anyone I know that is a mother...jesus christ PROPS TO YOU. I am pretty certain that today I could have had heart failure if I had done it alone and vice versa for Erica. Whilst he was asleep we took the time to prepare food for the evening and to empty the dishwasher etc, during this time Erica broke a glass....I cut my finger on the glass... it just was not our day.
Erica went to the supermarket to pick up a couple more bits and Riccardo only woke up five minutes before she came back so I managed to keep him settled for once today playing with him in his play pen. She had bought these different kinder things that looked so tasty and since I saw them I can't stop thinking about them...like when do we try these creations!? But she is skinny and I must learn her ways haha! After she came back I did a pilates/HIIT workout using the Fitness Blender channel again...that is another life saver of mine here! Then we prepared dinner in which Riccardo was shouting the whole way through and even after walking round the garden in circles a gazillion times pushing his pram round after dinner I still had no success whatsoever in getting him to sleep. He has barely had any proper naps today and he has been so restless!
I can only hope that this is a learning curve for me and that I will be better when more days like this come. I feel so bloody knackered after today! Children are so cute but so much work, I think if anyone doesn't hear from me for the next week I'm either sleeping after today or I have thrown myself off the balcony.
Goodnight. Enjoy laughing at my pain.
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